Wednesday, August 20, 2008

People never fail to amaze me

I came across this article which was about a very mean obituary printed in a paper/online paper in California

It was later pulled because it was so "mean". However, I think it is due to all the backlash that came about.
Seems the paper did indeed verify the woman's death before they ran the obituary-but then it was decided ... well, that it was just mean and pulled it, especially considering the guest book that got over 200 signatures of cruel nature.

So here it is-the entire thing. The obituary of Dolores Aguilar

Dolores Aguilar
1929 - Aug. 7, 2008

Dolores Aguilar, born in 1929 in New Mexico, left us on August 7, 2008. She will be met in the afterlife by her husband, Raymond,her son, Paul Jr., and daughter, Ruby.

She is survived by her daughters Marietta, Mitzi, Stella, Beatrice, Virginia and Ramona, and son Billy; grandchildren, Donnelle, Joe, Mitzie, Maria, Mario, Marty, Tynette, Tania, Leta, Alexandria, Tommy, Billy, Mathew, Raymond, Kenny, Javier, Lisa, Ashlie and Michael; great-grandchildren, Brendan, Joseph, Karissa, Jacob, Delaney, Shawn, Cienna, Bailey, Christian, Andre Jr., Andrea, Keith, Saeed, Nujaymah, Salma, Merissa, Emily, Jayci, Isabella, Samantha and Emily. I apologize if I missed anyone.

Dolores had no hobbies, made no contribution to society and rarely shared a kind word or deed in her life. I speak for the majority of her family when I say her presence will not be missed by many, very few tears will be shed and there will be no lamenting over her passing.

Her family will remember Dolores and amongst ourselves we will remember her in our own way, which were mostly sad and troubling times throughout the years. We may have some fond memories of her and perhaps we will think of those times too. But I truly believe at the end of the day ALL of us will really only miss what we never had, a good and kind mother, grandmother and great-grandmother. I hope she is finally at peace with herself. As for the rest of us left behind, I hope this is the beginning of a time of healing and learning to be a family again.

There will be no service, no prayers and no closure for the family she spent a lifetime tearing apart. We cannot come together in the end to see to it that her grandchildren and great-grandchildren can say their goodbyes. So I say here for all of us, GOOD BYE, MOM.

Friday, August 08, 2008

Freaky moment, and lesson learned ie car windows

so today I get an email that my library book I requested from out of state is in. I decide to take the kids to the park and swing by the library and then come home

I get all the kids dressed and we load up in the van and take off. A few minutes later I hear the kids screaming.


me: "what? what" starting to panic

kids: "ahhhh" "theres a caaaaaaaa" "ahhhh" more screams.

I am seriously panicing and look in the rearview mirror and see this freaking CAT crawling up and over Noan and it starts sprinting to the front of the van

*insert kids still screaming bloody murder" you'd have thought they were in danger or something

so the danged cat comes on the left side of the van, up and over my seat, over my shoulder and lodges itself in the front windshield with its claws firmly implanted in my leg


I am screaming in pain, the kids are screaming still in fear...and yelling at me to get it out! and I am swerving to the side of the road to try figure this out

I pull over. and I am sitting there "get it out!" "open the door" more screams

my leg-still hurting from the claws dug in. I am thinking at that moment, crap- how do I get it to let go of me and get out?

SO i open the door and he is laying on it partially so his body starts to go with it...he finally lets go and takes off out of the van and runs about 6 houses down the road before he turns around and looks back at us.

the screaming-blessedly stops

I don't know who was more scared...the kids or the cat wondering what the heck all the screaming was for!

oh yeah-and the only thing we can figure is that it got in the van last night before the storm hit and we closed the now I am going to have to start looking for animal poop - oh JOY! not!

Thursday, August 07, 2008

Some new longies for my little man

so I am being super prepared and getting the fall/winter knitting done- well, not done but at least started now!

Here are Harrison's newest longies . Blue and brown peace fleece. they are a bit long, but should last him a while. They go down over his feet and he kind of freaked out and was trying to rip them off his toes at first! I guess he inherited his mama's penchant for NOT covering her toes! LOL

Monday, August 04, 2008

How do you prepare to say goodbye?

This is a really hard post for me. But I am hoping that by typing it out and getting it off my chest, maybe I can start to deal with it.

To give some background first:

I never grew up with a dad. My biological father left my mom when she was pregnant with me. I found out just a few years ago that he is 100% mentally disabled according to the government in relation to his service in I understand now.

But I didn't know that as a child.

I grew up feeling abandoned by my father and wondering what was so wrong with me that he didn't want anything to do with me.

My mom-she is wonderful. I couldn't have asked for a better relationship with a parent. We lived in California until I was 16. When all the other kids were sneaking out, drinking, partying etc...I wasn't. My mom knew that she could utterly trust me to be a good person...and I was.

This brings me to my hard part.

The only real father figure I had growing up was my grandpa. He was always there for me. my grandparents were always there and helped to raise me. The closeness we have is wonderful. Even knowing my real dad now, my grandpa WAS for all intents and purposes my dad growing up.

A few years ago, my grandfather had a stroke. My grandma didn't take him in until the next day and as a result, he did not get TPA which could have helped to reverse some of the affects.

Following his stroke, he really struggled. He is a very proud man. He had a hard time walking and talking clearly. He recognized that his body failed him and he gave up. He just seemed to throw his hands in the air and decided that life was not worth living anymore.

He started smoking again. He stopped doing fun stuff. He mopes around.

For 2 years he has done this...and now-he is having strokes again and they don't know how much longer he has left.

How do I prepare to say goodbye to this wonderful wonderful man who was my father growing up? The man that I admire so much and look up to and love so deeply?

I am 2 hours away. and all I want is to be there with them. To help my grandma take care of him as his body fails and he looses control of his functions. To be there to hold her when she cries and to hug him as he accepts what is coming.

I don't know that I can do this.

Just days after his first stroke:

Please Heavenly Father, please make his time left here good. Let him be free of pain. Let him have some joy. Let me have just one more time at least to see him and put my arms around him and let him know how much I love him.
And please bless my grandma-that she will have the strength to physically and emotionally deal with all that is coming.
In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

Sunday, August 03, 2008

baking frenzie

I found a great book the other day about making your own baby food...not your regular recipes either!

Today I decided that it was time to get things made. It was the complete and utter destroy my kitchen in the process day.

For Harrison I made:
peas, potatoes and leeks
blueberries and chicken
mango and chicken (his favorite!)
along with massur dal and carrots with jasmine rice from the other day

for the family we made:
1 loaf regular bread
1 loaf cinnamon raison bread
pumpkin muffins
HOMEMADE YOGURT..yes, I did it!

and we still have coming:
pumpkin bread and more regular bread

the house smells so good. now we just have to reclean it! LOL

You know what I LOVE

Toxic People suck


**edited original version. it felt good to get it out, but now it is time to delete it**