Friday, December 28, 2007
but it sucks. It really sucks to see your now 2 month old baby so miserable and in so much pain. It sucks to watch him scream as he tries to go the bathroom. It sucks to watch his tiny little body contort in pain....to see and smell him vomit from his reflux and know how much it hurts him.
It really sucks. And I wonder what lesson I am supposed to get out of this?
I was talking to Shawn about it the other day. I told him "you know, as much as I didn't want to be pregnant in the beginning, you would have thought that I would get a nice happy baby to make up for the unexpected surprise"
to which he responds..."this is your payback" Thank you so much for making me feel like crap!
my immediate retort was "I don't think that Heavenly Father would do that!"
so then, what is the reason? I can't see it. And I hate what he is going through.
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
We had an amazing Christmas this year. The kids are very happy with what they got. I just wish we would have had more sleep before starting the gift opening! LOL
Harrison is still not doing so hot. He started on Zantac for his reflux. He is also on nystatin for the thrush and probiotics for the thrush and his poor messed up digestive system. He still can't pass his stools very well and is quite miserable. I am still beyond exhausted holding him upright all night everynight to sleep on the couch. It will get better one day. In fact, it seems to a bit already since the zantac started...or maybe I am just delusional.
We got a check from the insurance company for our car. it wasn't very much so we had a limited budget to work with to get our new one. I got a picture of the old car before they took it away. It wasn't a very good angle, but you can see some of the damage. we are missing quite a bit off the front..almost a few feet
and here is the new car. it is an older VW Jetta. We found out the first few nights we had it that it does indeed handle well in the snow :)
The kids are all home on Christmas break. It has been a bit insane. Harrison is changing so much everyday and I am glad they have this time to play with him. he had a doctors appointment the other day and at weeks he is 10lb11oz.
Sunday, December 02, 2007
I would get
sock yarn which is a big dream cause you need 2 skeins!
and these DPN's to make socks
and these tips for my needles
(or gift certificates to the above stores to buy what I wanted from there later!)
I really like this knitting bag but in this fabric from Michaels
There is also a cool pin cushion that is in the shape of a dress form that is blue and black swirls. I love it!
and some little markers like this or this for specific projects that need to be placed and removed easily.
Of course, for the family, we really need some new pots and pans as ours are getting pretty ratty!
the hard anodized sets like kitchen aid and rachel ray are really good quality pans...but of course, we still need a 12" skillet! like this one that is 12" all the way to the bottom of the pan so it holds enough food for our family size!
Monday, November 26, 2007
HUH? the lady with him explains there was an accident, someone has the baby and Shawn is bleeding. I threw the items in my hand and took off running across the parking lot. Shawn and the kids are ok.
Shawn has a big knock on his head and an abrasion . After the swelling went down, he was left with 2 big black eyes that just get worse every day. The airbags literally exploded the glasses off of shawns face. It also knocked him out for a moment.
Conner has a big lump on his head. Harrison is ok.
The airbags deployed. The car is totalled.
The other guy was totally at fault (and was in fact cited) he pulled out really fast right in front of Shawn-Shawn had the right of way and could do nothing to avoid the accident. We are very grateful that Shawn was in the lane he was in. If he had been over one lane to the left, the guy would have hit us instead, and he would have hit us right where Conner and Harrison were sitting.
Shawn doesn't remember too much of it. It is kind of a blur. His face was burning from the chemicals in the airbags...and he was coughing all night. The chemicals are very harsh. After it all happened, he immediately rolled down his window, but the kids could not breathe very well. Conner reacted so fast! As soon as it happened, he saw the powder in the car and thought it was on fire! When Shawn regained consciousness, he (Conner) was out of the car and working quickly to get everyone out!
I am so proud of how level headed he (conner) was - especially for a 12 year old that was just in an accident that serious.
Shawn went and looked at the car today. I don't think he realized how bad it was till today. The steering wheel was pushed back right where his chest was. I am so grateful that we had airbags-or there is no knowing how seriously hurt he might have been.
This is what he looks like today:
This thanksgiving, I am most thankful that my family is ok and my husband is still with us
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
You Are Apple Pie
You're the perfect combo of comforting and traditional.
You prefer things the way you've always known them.
You'll admit that you're old fashioned, and you don't see anything wrong with that.
Your tastes and preferences are classic. And classic never goes out of style.
Those who like you crave security.
People can rely on you to be true to yourself - and true to them.
You're loyal, trustworthy, and comfortable in your own skin.
And because of these qualities, you've definitely earned a lot of respect.
|You Are Mashed Potatoes|
Oridnary, comforting, and more than a little predictable
You're the glue that holds everyone together.
Monday, November 19, 2007
Conner is doing well. He just got glasses this last week and his vision is getting pretty bad! He could only see about 15inches in front of him, and I don't know how he competed in gymnastics last year like that!
He was elected Student Council Representative this last week and is very excited. He also has his second Academic Bowl competition tomorrow. His team took first place last time and they are pretty excited about it. He is also a Student Ambassador and is enjoying that as well. With straight A's he is on the honor roll and his teachers are very impressed with the job I did homeschooling him. They said they wished they could clone him and have more students like him! Score 1 for the homeschooling mom! YAY!
Kaitlyn is also doing really well. She also has straight A's and is really doing well in school. She won a "responsible character" award this last week. Her teacher is impressed with her character and her willingness to help others learn and to help those that are having a hard time with making friends at school.
She is a big help to me. Everytime the baby fusses, she is right there before I can even get him! LOL
Noah is having a good time in school. He is getting almost straight A's. The one subject he is struggling in - well, that has been addressed with the teacher and should get better. She did not take the time to read his file and psych reports, so she was not giving him the assistance he needs to excel. Now that we have talked to her, it is getting better already.
He is really enjoying scouts this year and is making some friends! YES-making friends! unbelievable!
Hannah is doing good in school too. Her teacher says she enjoys having her so much in her class. She also won an award for "responsible character" Her teacher told a story of how there was a kid with a disability in her class was being teased and having a hard time getting along, and she went and tried to help him and talked to him. I am so proud of her for being such a caring person.
Alexis loves kindergarten. Every day she stands by the stove and announces to me each minute that passes until she is to leave to get on the bus! Her teacher told Shawn at conference "she doesn't have a problem expressing her opinions!" *OOPS* She is so funny.
Isabella is great. She has had a small amount of trouble adjusting to the changes with Harrison being born, but she is doing good over all. I think the hardest part is to get her to stop kissing him when he sleeps-so basically just leaving him alone!
harrison is doing well. at 2 weeks old, he is 8lb6oz! he just finished a growth spurt and it shows. he finally looks a bit healthier although none of his pants are fitting still! LOL they are all too big.
He is still struggling with some sensory stuff and has an issue with his tummy. The doctor thinks he may be having some reflux.
Will update soon with a picture of them all!
Saturday, November 17, 2007
Wednesday, November 07, 2007
I had already gotten the kids on the bus but thankfully Shawn had not left yet for work.
so I called stacy to let her know and started gathering my stuff as quick as I could. I had some moments of panic as I wasn't prepared to go in that soon-I joked with Shawn that it was almost like going into labor on my own! LOL
Shawn went and picked up the kids from school and I kept getting ready and off we went to the hospital. I actually was contracting 10 min apart at that moment-maybe excitement or maybe it was supposed to be my day anyway!
We got here and due to how sick I had been (not able to really eat or drink anything without getting sick) I was totally dehydrated and they could not start my IV or draw labs. it took about 45 minutes to successfully get my IV started :( I look like a pin cushion on my arms.
they finally got results back and started the pit at about 11:15am. man-even at the low dose they were some intense pains and I just remember I would look at Stacy as it started, then close my eyes and breath silently. The nurse thought I wasn't feeling anything because I was so calm--I quickly corrected her on that misconception! LOL
They continued to increase my pit. I started to stress because dr lowder had surgery at 12:00 and I really wanted him there. I think that kept me from progressing at the time. Finally at about 12:45 or so I was at a 5. A little bit later I told stacy "that one felt different" she asked if she should call the nurse and I said "no, let me make sure with another one" it wasn’t a pushing pressure but there was a different sensation.
So 2 more contractions and I said "yeah, we better call her to check me" cause I could tell we were close
she came and checked me and said I was a stretchy 8. "you better call him NOW"
By then the feeling was getting quite intense.
Dr Lowder got there and sat down and they had my feet up in position and I remember asking them/him "are you going to even check to see if I am 10 yet???"
he just looked at me and laughed and said "jessica-the head is RIGHT HERE!!"
I laughed too and he told me to laugh again because it was pushing the baby out!
Harrison Parker was born less than 30 seconds later at 1:11pm
20 ¾ inch long
14 ¼ inch head
Nursing is going well.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
She asked if I minded if she examined me - and then if Calista (the other nurse) could check me too. Calista is learning to do exams and I had no problem with that at all. Nancy was very excited when she checked me and told calista she'd be able to feel it right away.
So Calista checked, and yup, she was very excited that she could tell what I was! LOL YAY ME for having a good cervix.
So 2cm, 50% effaced, head is 0 station. they could poke through the opening in my cervix and touch his head.
My BP was still higher than normal, but back down a bit so we are good till Tuesday. I am really starting to swell and my headaches have increased, so that is not the best news but-what can you do?
So that is all for now. I've been having lots of contractions today but nothing to excite me much.
Friday, October 19, 2007
got checked today due to how sick I have been. 1 1/2 cm dilated now...36 weeks and 3 days. I gained 1 cm in the last week! woo hoo. LOL cause that means SO much-not!
other than that, we are good. I am grumpy. My family keeps irritating me hormones *cough* *cough* hormones and it seems all I want to do is sleep.
The only thing I look forward to soon with him coming is that I will start to normalize in my hormones again....well, as normal as can be expected!
and Shawn-stop laughing and agreeing with me!
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Friday, October 12, 2007
he said to use common sense and if my contractions are bad, take it easy...duh! LOL
so almost 1 cm, very softat 25% effaced and head is down at -2 station
because of my distance from the office, he said I don't even have to go back for 2 weeks! (unless I have issues! LOL) woo hoo!!!! now I can get some stuff done!
and key points of the article:
The city also reported today that it has placed Eichhorn on leave
- In a prepared statement, the department said it did so after a controversy over the suit caused it to review the incident.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Goldfish-Knit from my own dyed yarn from our store Nurturing Threads
then we have some new longies knit from yarn from Laurie at Mommy's" Little Sweetie
and shorts, again dyed by me in the mint chocolate colorway.
OK, so I have been very busy with making stuff for this little boy. I finally got rid of my fear and took on knit binding on the neckline for shirts. So much easier than FOE!
The shirt pattern is from New Conceptions baby essentials
The sewn pants are from Ottobre Design/ (a wonderful pattern magazine out of Finland)
The knitted longies are from Little Turtle Knits/ picky pants pattern.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
here is the story:
Cops falls on the job, sues family
some lovely little tidbits:
- One of the rescuers, Casselberry police Sgt. Andrea Eichhorn, is suing, alleging the family left a puddle of water on the floor that afternoon, causing her to slip and fall.
- accusing them of negligence. They were careless, according to the suit, and allowed the home they shared to become unsafe
- If the Cosmillos had made their pool baby-proof, police would not have been called to the scene, there would have been no water on the floor, and Eichhorn would not have hurt herself, he said
I really cannot say anything on this subject without being foul, so I will let you draw your own conclusions.
All I can say is, if I were in that city, I'd gladly sit on the jury for this trial!
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
Not that this is really exciting by any means as I ALWAYS drop early...along with dilating early and effacing early. I just don't go INTO labor early! LOL
When I had Isabella, I was 5+ cm and 100% effaced and not in labor. but hey! progress is progress right?
Still on bedrest. Getting pretty frustrated with it as it is so hard to run a household with 8 people while stuck in bed. Luckily I am still able to get up and sew. Been knitting more too, those are posted on my crafty blog.
The business is doing good. We get so many requests for custom orders. I was also approached by a store that sells online and in a B&M physical store and she wanted me to contact her regarding my knitting needle rolls and stitch markers to possibly carry in her stores. I am too busy right now, but I will keep it in mind. We also ran a co-op on our yarn for an online group, and I have 70 skeins to dye before he is born. . . so I am following the rules and sitting at the counter to do it! LOL
I am hoping that my pressure is going down. I really do not want another appointment with a super high pressure! 142/94 was pretty bad (especially since my normal is 112/78) and I think a second reading like that with the protein may make Dr Lowder do something more that we aren't ready for.
Thats all for now. Will have more on current events later.
Sunday, September 30, 2007
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
No sugar in my urine though-so that was a good thing. I have lost a lb...bringing my total pregnancy weight gain to just over 1 lb. Luckily, it doesn't seem to bother Dr. Lowder much! LOL
Baby sounds good. He is head down already, confirming my guess that he had moved and that was why I had lost half my belly! LOL
I was told to take it easy over the next few weeks and we will see how my pressure and urine are at my next appointment.
I am so glad that he is not quick to rush to any quick interventions or suggestions of what needs to be done.
That is it. Picture to come soon!
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
* Size NEWBORN prefolds from Green Mountain Diapers
* Longies, size small
* size small proraps cloth diaper covers.
* Nice thick hooded towels
* Lansinoh disposable breast pads
* Paul Mitchell baby shampoo
I hope that helps!
Monday, September 17, 2007
I am on light bedrest right now due to contractions that I was having pretty regularly last week. I am hoping that we are seen on Wednesday that I will be released from that! I also am really sick and had to get on some antibiotics to kick it, and I am starting to feel a bit better
My blood pressure was up Friday. 140/92. That worries me. The last few births I didn't start raising my pressure until closer to delivery (about 37 weeks) so I do not like that it is high already! Hopefully with all this rest, it is going down and I will get good news Wednesday.
So Harrison has turned position. He is no longer laying trasnverse (sideways) which is good. I am not sure if he is breech now or vertex (head down) but I will ask Dr. Lowder. The bad news about him turning is that due to my anterior placenta he is all in my back, right on my spine and hips which is causing me more pain in my SI Joint problem . I also have lost half my belly! LOL and am not looking nearly as pregnant as I was.
So my friend Darcy asked for a picture of my new funky glasses. I promise to have one tomorrow along with new belly pictures!
Thursday, August 23, 2007
2) overalls. what sadistic MAN ever thought up making MATERNITY OVERALLS!!!!??? uhm, hello????? Do you not realize how many times a day pregnant women pee???? And to have to un-do and re-do those straps EVERY SINGLE TIME!!!! What a dumb idea!
3) hormones-we just won't even go there. you have a problem with that?
4) hunger, bloating, cravings, gas--the list goes on and on.
*sigh* it will be over soon. and it will be worth it. but the journey there is SOO not fun right now!
Should I laugh? cry? be angry?? or all of the above?
Here are some projects I have done again for baby Harrison
This is a cloth diaper sleeper sack by dandelion dreamers pattern and a cloth diaper soaker by curly purly pattern.
The Dandelion dreamers sack was kettle dyed BFL in my acorn colorway. The Curly Purly was a plymouth outback yarn.
another sleeper sack out of Malabrigo Tortuga wool yarn. The booties are the Little Turtle Knits stripe bootie pattern and the red/brown soaker is Little Turtle Knits hybrid rib soaker.
Then with fall in the air, I have done some new colorways for my yarn!
Sunday, August 19, 2007
So, this month. Its been a while since I posted last. I cut off all my hair. Granted - the lady took off about 3-4 inches more than I asked for, so I didn't really get what I wanted, but I will adjust.
I got new glasses, some really fun and funky ones!
Baby Harrison is growing. My belly has gotten just a tad bit bigger. Yesterday a lady still couldn't tell I was pregnant!
Will post pictures soon. Been insanely busy as school starts this week.
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Do you know what it is? If not, you could be at risk.
Most women know; check your breasts, if you have a lump go to the doctor-and start having mammograms at age 40.
But what if the cancer doesn't make a lump? And is undetectable by mammogram?
Inflammatory Breast Cancer aka IBC is the most AGRESSIVE form of breast cancer. Estimates say it could be around 6 to even 10% of breast cancers are this type. Most women don't know they have it until it is TOO LATE.
symptoms may include:
One breast larger than the other
Red or pink skin
Swelling Rash (entire breast or small patches)
Orange-like texture (peau d’orange)
Skin hot to the touch
Pain and/or itchiness
Ridges or thickened areas of breast
Nipples that appear inverted or flattened
Swollen lymph nodes under the armpit or on the neck
And if you think you are exempt because you are young??? Wrong
Women as young as 16 and 24 are documented on THIS NEWS PAGE .
This is a serious issue ladies. Please, pass this information onto the women in your lives. If your doctor is not familiar with it (as most are NOT) then print off the reports from THIS NEWS PAGE and take it in with you.
If you have a symptom above GET A BIOPSY! this is the ONLY way to know for sure if you have it.
Know your breasts ladies. Pay attention to the changes. NOTIFY your doctor and GET THE CARE you need before it may be too late.
Monday, June 25, 2007
It was pretty in your face the moment he put the doppler on my tummy! LOL, he took it off immediately and moved somewhere else since he lets us stay in suspense till the end and I don't think he realized we already saw it! LOL but of course, I wasn't "SURE" with the view
Everything looked good. We had a hard time with getting pictures because of the placenta really being in the way. At the end when Dr Lowder went to show us the gender, the baby closed its legs! LOL he says "AH! tell it to open the legs back up!! but I already know cause I peeked!"
Currently he is weighing in at 12 oz.
so he checks again, legs are open and freezes the picture on the screen and just puts the arrow there and turns and looks at me. I could see it and started laughing and was thinking "guess that isn't an umbilical cord!!!"
The kids saw it then and said "its a boy!" and Bella started crying and burried her face in Shawn's neck because she was insistent that it be a girl!
so Harrison Parker will be joining our family sometime late this fall
Dh kept saying " I told you so" and I didn't want to take away his thunder that I was already feeling it, just not accepting it! LOL I don't think he reads my long blog entries so it is ok for me to admit that I already knew--duh! why else was I buying boy clothes and fabric??? I just didn't want to admit it cause his "I know it is a boy" was getting really annoying! LMBO Secretly, I really wanted a boy and I am so very excited that he is coming!
So here is our 20 week belly shot. I had to really scrunch it up in this picture to get it to show
My weight is now under my starting weight, but we aren't too concerned. Baby is obviously growing and looks good.
Thats's all for now!
First off, some more longies I did for the baby
The first pair is Malabrigo and the second pair is Pure Wool
Then I did this yarn for the store:
and started these squares for the baby blanket
Friday, June 22, 2007
1) I am pregnant with my 7th child, and I am 31 years old.
2) I was a cheerleader in highschool, back when it was about talent! LOL
3) I love to knit.
4) I often feel like I don't measure up to the other women in my church.
5) My hair should be red to match my Irish temper.
6) I was engaged to my husband just a short 2 weeks after I met him.
7) I once went to a taping of the Jerry Springer show.
8) I don't care if I have grammatical or spelling errors when I type online. I am not writing an english paper darn it! LOL
Ok, so on to things.
In reading Jo's blog this last week, I came across some really despicable people. People that once again believe all the propoganda they are read about every thing they ever learned. This particular topic was the new Gardasil Vaccine for HPV aka Human Papilloma Virus and how dumb we were for not getting it for our daughters.
First off, Gardasil has already caused 3 deaths and over 1,637 adverse vaccination reactions reported--including 371 very serious reactions which included paralysis, Bells Palsy, Guillain-Barre Syndrome, and seizures.
All since it was first adminstered.
Doctors are recommending girls as young as 9 get this vaccine.
here is an idea. HPV is a sexually transmitted disease! TEACH YOUR CHILDREN ABSTINENCE! Teach them to be abstaining from sex before marriage. Teach them to be responsible. But that is just too hard for some that don't want to have to actually raise their children after they bring them into this world and teach them values and morals.
Why why why do we keep coming out with all these vaccines that are not 100% effective - that do cause deaths and serious reactions.
Why? Its all about the money.
Sunday, June 17, 2007
About the men in the video:
Dick and Rick Hoyt are a father-and-son team from Massachusetts who together compete just about continuously in marathon races. And if they’re not in a marathon they are in a triathlon — that daunting, almost superhuman, combination of 26.2 miles of running, 112 miles of bicycling, and 2.4 miles of swimming. Together they have climbed mountains, and once trekked 3,735 miles across America.
It’s a remarkable record of exertion — all the more so when you consider that Rick can't walk or talk.
For the past twenty five years or more Dick, who is 65, has pushed and pulled his son across the country and over hundreds of finish lines. When dick runs, Rick is in a wheelchair that dick is pushing. When dick cycles, Rick is in the seat-pod from his wheelchair, attached to the front of the bike. When dick swims, Rick is in a small but heavy, firmly stabilized boat being pulled by dick.
At Rick’s birth in 1962 the umbilical cord coiled around his neck and cut off oxygen to his brain. dick and his wife, Judy, were told that there would be no hope for their child’s development.
To read more about this amazing father and son team, visit: Team Hoyt
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
I have numerous smaller stones in my gallbladder. I also have one that is a bit over 2cm. I didn't think it was that big until I actually saw it on my measuring tape!
The size makes most alternative treatments go out of the picture.
One of my other measurements pertaining to the gallbladder were also listed on the high side of normal (can't remember what it was) but they will have to watch that too.
Good news is, no dilation of bile ducts.
So for now, I deal with it. I have to eat low fat. That only turns out to be hard when take out is offered or when we eat food not prepared by us.
Monday, June 04, 2007
It is set to be released soon.
Click on it to view.<
if that link does not work, try this one:
Link to commercial
Thursday, May 31, 2007
We have been working on medications this last year to try and slow things down in his brain so that he can function. He went back to public school this year and really struggled at first. He was failing. He was being bullied all the time . The teacher would not listen when I told him his process of learning. We finally got through to her, and she changed her ways with him.
We found that the zoloft he was on was actually exaggerating his problems and making them worse and we switched to a new medication (trazadone) in January, and it has been a world of difference. he is finally affectionate. He will allow me to hug him and will also initiate a hug. For almost 8 years we have had the opposite...he would pull away if you tried to touch hi. I cry almost every time because I just can't believe it is him! (he actually climbed up on the couch and sat next to me the other day and then leaned over and SNUGGLED ME! I looked at Shawn with this dumbfounded look on my face and he was looking at me the same way!
He has made the honor roll 3 quarters in a row now...today his award was for "high honor roll" which is straight-A's!
He also WON A BIKE from the local car dealership for perfect attendance.
I am so proud of him. I am so glad to finally see him happy. To see a smile on his face.
And he has actually made a FRIEND!I just had to share-it was such a hard decision to start him on medications, but now I am so glad that we did.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
I have kind of expected this. I have been having intestinal issues for 1 1/2 years and with my family history-I kind of suspected. It is nice to have an answer now-but it really sucks for finding things to eat.
Most things I eat sends me into pain or into the bathroom. It is pretty miserable. For now, Dr. Lowder wants to try and keep me good with diet so that we do not have to do surgery while I am pregnant. I can understand that - but man this sucks big time.
Yes, I know pregnancy increases chances of gallstones. Yes, I know about flushes. Yes I know everyone and their dog "knows someone else that has gone through this and they were just fine." I get that. I don't have to be reminded everytime I talk about it! LOL
So this means for me, not risking going to far from home until the pregnancy is over. I have a hyperirritable uterus and with the pain comes contractions. I cannot risk being too far from home, the ER and my OB if a bad attack were to send me into preterm labor.
It also means that I am going to have to go almost totally vegan/raw. Just about everything I eat right now is a trigger....but hey, gives me something new to concentrate on right?
I see OB again tomorrow. We will find out when the u/s will be. Plus we will talk more about this crap that is going on.
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Good news is, I have been feeling the baby move. The ER could not find FHT's on the baby Sunday night so my OB had me come in for a quick check Monday morning. Not only is my fundal height higher than it should be for how far along I am (and we are SURE on dates) but I have an anterior placenta again. Heart looked good on baby and was beating fast. When he was looking for it, he got to one spot and as we heard the baby move on the doppler I felt it too....so all those little movements really were the baby! At only 14 weeks! :) I think the u/s that day was the first time I have actually cried during a scan...I was just so relieved to see the baby was ok.
So..now it is a waiting game to see how long it takes the radiologist to get her report to my OB. I hope it soon.
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Patsy was diagnosed with lung cancer in August of last year. She was ill with a cough for many months and the doctors never did a chest x-ray. By the time they checked, she had a tumor in her lung and the cancer had spread to her liver and brain.
Patsy fought very hard. We ran auctions to do fundraisers for the family and I collected quilt sqaures from our online communities to make her a quilt.
She was doing "fair" up until 3 days ago. Thursday. She was admitted to the hospital and went downhill from there. Today she was in a coma on life support.
She took her last breath at 9:30 EST. She leaves behind a husband and 7 children.
Patsy, I will always think of you when I see Captain Jack Sparrow. May you and your family have peace.
I will miss you.
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
I came across this today and found it quite funny
I hear this all the time. "what about socialization?"
My answer? I want them to be civilized. Not socialized. And truly-what socialization do they learn at school? They learn to sit in a desk. They are told not to talk. And then they run around for 15 minutes at recess beating on each other. Teachers don't teach social skills. Parents do.
Friday, May 04, 2007
I think I understand now.
Since I found out I was pregnant, I have struggled so much with upset feelings. Feelings of dismay, of anger, of indifference.
I had truly believed that we were done having kids and I was very excited contemplating what was going to be in store for me and our family in the next few years.
I had my plan set. School, maybe a trip.
Then this baby came and knocked me off my feet. I was in shock. Denial. Angry. Disbelieving. I kept wondering "WHY" Why did Heavenly Father do this to us? I was so very unhappy and have struggled to accept it.
Then the last 24 hours, I had the wind knocked out of me. And by a fictional book and television show to say the least. I was reminded of what was important.
It started last night watching TV. There were 2 scenarios. One was of a single woman who was getting older and wanted desperately to have a child. She had terminated a previous pregnancy and now found that she was out of time. She had no chance of having a baby. She had no eggs left. She was devastated.
The second was of a huge messy triangle of people that involved several men, a surrogate and a mother to be. Watching the desperation for a baby. Seeing the emotions when it failed. The surrogate kept the baby and the family that was expecting the child didn't get to have it. They were just deflated.
Then I read a fictional book by a LDS author today that dealt with a couple with infertility. Reading the raw emotions was so painful. The struggle they went through to try and have a baby repeatedly. I was crying almost the whole book.
Realizing that there are women out there that will NEVER have what we do. Never get to feel a baby move and kick from within their womb. Never get that exhilarating feeling of pushing and hearing babies first cry. Never get to hold that child to their breast and inhale the sweet scent of my babies head while I nourish him/her.
I am so selfish. I have that chance. And I failed to enjoy it. I failed to be thankful for it.
It doesn't matter if I am ready for this. It doesn't matter what our family thinks. It doesn't matter if we understand the big picture or what plans we were already making.
For some reason, Heavenly Father saw fit to send us another precious child. I do not understand the reasons behind it. But how arrogant was I to question it? This baby is here for a reason. . because Heavenly Father wishes it to be so.
I am in awe. and I am so very humbled and thankful.
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
I cannot even begin to tell you how much of a relief that was. So we couldn't get the heartbeat, so he did a quick u/s to check since I am almost 12 weeks. Baby was there heart beating away. It actually looked like a baby this time. Very cool.
My BP was up at 140/100. But we did get it back down to 120/80 after a bit. I am also already spilling protein in my urine. I am hoping I am just dehydrated as I really don't want the pre-eclampsia to start so early this time.
Now I can tell Shawn to STOP teasing me about 2 babies and just enjoy the pregnancy....once I feel better that is.
And just because I haven't posted anything political lately, here you go again.
and my all time favorite:
These were knit from hand dyed malabrigo. size small. combo of the curly purly waist and LTK pattern along with a bit of stacy thrown in. I like the malabrigo for a small baby because it is so soft, and I don't have to worry about pilling as much because they dont' move as much! LOL
ok, so I learned what NOT to do while pregnant and exhausted.KNIT
I must wait until I am more awake before I continue on with what is on my needles. why?? well, because somehow, you can make mistakes. and I could not tell you how I did this....it wasn't that I just didn't move it from one side to the other. I actually KNIT IT into the pattern! Seriously, just could not figure it out! yes, that is my ROW COUNTER!!!!
we now call it longie baby bling! LOL
Monday, April 30, 2007
The statistics, if they bothered to look, supports the saftey of homebirth and birthing center births. The statistics show that babies born with midwives out of a hospital setting have lower numbers of problems during the birth. They have better outcomes. They have better breastfeeding rates. There is so much I could write here about statistics that would make your eyes glaze over!
Why are they so afraid?
Because a homebirth or birthing center birth doesn't get society any money.
Society gains with hospital births. With inductions and micro-managed births and c-sections.
Yes, there is a place for Obstetrics. They should be attending to the higher risk pregnant women. Leave the low-risk women to the midwives. Let them have the birth they want.
Did you know Idaho wants to take this away? Legislature is going on to stop midwives. To keep births in a hospital setting. To get involved in every little detail. They don't care to even look at the numbers. They only want the doctors numbers. No, not the numbers of the bad outcomes that OB's do have...they want the numbers the doctors provide of transports. They want the numbers from the doctors that they can twist to make the midwives look bad.
If they drop this legilsature, then the doctors lose money. That is the bottom line.
As a doula (professional labor support) and a mother of 6, who is currently pregnant-it disgusts me. At one point my dream was to become a midwife. But what is going on in this country is scary. We would do very well to look at the birthing ideals and statistics from other countries. This is not the place that the USA prevails.
I still love what I do. To be there at a birth, to help a mother through her labor and see that sweet baby afterwards and know that I helped this mom have a beautiful birth that she wanted....there is nothing like it.
But I do get discouraged. I would urge all people in Idaho to write letters to their legislators urging them to not take away the midwives. To not let them control and bind the hands of the midwives. To let us CHOOSE OUR BIRTH.
I went for my accupuncture treatment the other day and had some relief. I had actually started feeling good a few days before that (well, better on the nausea) but I woke up today just wanting to flush my head down the toilet. I've been so sick all day again. Nothing I eat settles at all. It really sucks.
I did make it to the grocery store. I think most of the meals this week are meat free and bland. I have noticed that the more meat *I* eat, the more bloated and crappy I feel, so I am following my bodies promptings and cutting it back heavily to see what kind of improvement I can feel.
Kaitlyn is still meat free. It has been almost 3 months. She hasn't been tempted once, and I am so very proud of her for making this decision and sticking to it. It is important to her.
Isabella cut some MORE of her hair off tonight. I swear if she doesn't stop soon she will have hair the length of conners! And I swear if Shawn doesn't stop leaving scissors down where she can get them I am going to let HER cut HIS hair! LOL
Shawn will not stop with the insistence that I am having another twin pregnancy. He doesn't seem to get it when I tell him how much it is stressing me out. I wish he would stop because it actually hurts me feelings. I know he thinks it is funny, but having told him how much it bothers me-and then his insistence in doing it makes me feel like he doesn't care how much he is hurting me.
Our store is still doing well. I have had to ake a few weeks off from stocking since I have been so sick. Hopefully I can start again soon.
Shawn told his mom tonight about the baby. I guess his brother Paul and wife Amy are also expecting again (their 3rd) They are due 2 weeks after I am! We are going to have a baby boom!
ack-too tired....will write more later.
Saturday, April 28, 2007
I am on several message boards. Granted, they are more "natural" parenting. But we get a lot of mainstream folks over there that just gasp with shock over things we say! And then proceed to give their input on every subject and have no idea what they are even talking about.
Oh yes, homeopathics are not helpful. Tell that to my daughter whose fever can be broke in 15 minutes with a dose that is not at all harmful to her body vs 3-4-6 doses of tylenol or ibuprophen that do nothing.
Every boy should be circumcised. Because it is necessary...see previous rants on that.
Vaccines, well of course they are totally safe, because if there were reactions, then surely the CDC would have that information on their site right?
Just because a doctor or nurse tells you something doesn't make it true. There is a whole world of information out there. Research you need to find yourself. If you have children, you need to be informed. You need to be educated. YOURSELF. Not just blindly following the information crammed down your throat.
Until you can say that you do really know, be quiet.
Monday, April 23, 2007
Then I decided "eh, screw it" if they want to read my personal life, go right ahead! They might actually learn something about me and get to know ME.
So things have been tough the last few weeks. I am beyond tired and ill. This has been the worst pregnancy ever. It is unlike any of the others. And I don't know what this baby is...which is abnormal for me. The only time this has ever happened before was when I was pregnant with the twins. It wasn't until after I lost one of them that I knew the remaining baby was a girl. Shawn of course thinks that this is a sign (combined with everything else) that we are having twins again and is predicting 2 boys...identical. I don't-but I am putting it out there just for the record! LOL
I am having my first accupuncture treatment this weekend and I am very excited! My friend Julie is an accupuncturist and also does chinese medicine. I plan on having her work with me throughout the pregnancy.
I am still having issues with my blood sugars. But I do think they are getting better.
Saturday, we are going to start on our garden. I hope. We bought the seeds again. Lets see if they get planted vs sitting on the counter all year! LOL
Thats all for now.
Thursday, April 05, 2007
|You Are An ISTJ|
|The Duty Fulfiller|
You are responsible, reliable, and hardworking - you get the job done.
You prefer productive hobbies, like woodworking or knitting.
Quiet and serious, you are well prepared for whatever life hands you.
Conservative and down-to-earth, you hardly ever do anything crazy.
You would make a great business executive, accountant, or lawyer.
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
Shawn has the "but he will look different than me, he will look different from his brothers" argument.
I still say no. I asked him to please read the description and view the video before making his decision. Had I known then what I know now about circumcision, I would have never done it with the other boys.
Description of how it is done complete with pictures
Video intro page (make sure to click on 'proceed to download' to get the video)
why? why would you cause your newborn baby that kind of pain for something so un-needed? Do you know the facts on circumcision? Most do not.
- No national or international medical association recommends routine circumcision
- There is no MEDICAL reason for circumcision. It is purely cosmetic.
- Depending on the amount of skin cut off, circumcision robs a male of as much as 80 percent or more of his penile skin
- Circumcision desensitizes
- Circumcision is unhygienic and unhealthy
- No special care is needed for the uncircumcised penis
- More and more insurance companies are NOT covering circumcision as it becomes more known as an elective procedure. You will also find it harder to have a physician willing to perform it.
- IT IS PAINFUL. Don't let them fool you with the "this anesthesia will take away the pain" IT HURTS. Period.
Education is key. Don't just swallow the line they try to feed you. Look into it yourself. Protect your son.
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
we had dinner early tonight. 2 hours ago I turned to dh and said "why am I so hungry?" him: "uh-duh!!!"
so I decide to make something else to eat..decide on grilled cheese. dh goes to make it, the kids ate all the bread!! So I sit her for 1 hour thinking about it. ...in the meantime, oldest son gets Shawn his shoes and says "lets go get mom something to eat"
Shawn gets dressed, starts to leave and I am thinking he is going to get me something to eat.
I am confused, and I send Kailtyn running out to the car to ask if he wants to know what I want to eat. She comes back in and says "he is just going to get a loaf of bread to make you a sandwhich"
to which I promptly burst into tears because I no longer want a darned grilled cheese sandwhich-I want a hamburger at 11pm!
*sigh* this really sucks.
Sunday, April 01, 2007
Childish. Mean. Self serving. Immature behavior.
You would think at our age, we'd be past highschool crap like that.
*insert a big rolling eyes*
You can't beat good friends-and I am glad I have the best!
Saturday, March 24, 2007
Last year we made plans for our family.
1) We were done having children. 6 was enough. Isabella was even a surprise for us since with my medical condition, we are not supposed to be able to get pregnant on our own due to my lack of ovulation.
2) I was going back to school next year when Bella was 4 to finish my degree in Criminal Justice-the preperation for moving on to another school (if needed) to get any more education I needed for investigating crime scenes. We figured next year was good because she could go with me and attend the preschool on campus and I wouldn't be leaving her for long
3) We could sell our home and move -and get away from this horrible family we live next to that hurts our children.
4) We started decluttering-getting rid of anything that was too small for the kids and giving it all away. We still have quite a bit of junk to get rid of, but we took a whole van full of clothing and toys and baby things that we didn't need.
We had great plans. We forgot to ask Heavenly Father if they were the right plans.
So this last week, He reminded us that He is in control.
Out the window went all of our planning.
It's funny. Shawn accepted it easier than I did. I cried. I didn't want to have another baby. We were just leaving that whole baby phase and was moving on to a place where our family was growing and we were really starting to do a lot of fun stuff together.
Shawn laughed. He knew that for some reason, Heavenly Father wants us to have this child. I know that too-it is just harder for me to accept. I am scared. My pre-eclampsia has gotten worse each pregnancy. My blood sugars get worse. It is pretty hard on me.
I am more worried about telling family. I know my mom will be very accepting. She believes in Shawn and I. She knows that we love our children and treat them well. It is everyone else I am worried about.
I am so tired and nauseated. I keep falling asleep off and on during the day, then I can't sleep at night. I saw Dr. Lowder the other day to confirm and he said everything looks great. He was excited for us. The shock and panic have started to wear off and I am feeling a bit of excitement.
We have to re-buy everything as we gave it all away!
So there it is. The best laid plans...blah blah blah.
New baby, joining our family around November 13th 2007
I hope He knows what He is doing! LOL
Friday, March 23, 2007
We finished the gymnastics season and decided to take a break for a year. Competition is so time consuming-and we want to do more things right now besides live at the gym!
Spring has come-and it is so nice and cheerful to have the sunlight. It makes the days so nice-although I do miss curling up on the couch with a good book on a cloudy/rainy day!
My biggest concern with spring/summer coming is the next door neighbors children. It is a big laugh that the father has issues with our parenting, yet his children are out of control! He doesn't think we are good parents because we do things different-we don't beat our children. We aren't abusive. But we are the bad ones here.
His kids beat my boys up. Throw rocks at the girls over the fence in the backyard. Shoot the kids with their air gun pellets--but our kids are no good.
I am afraid to even let them go outside to play. I wish we could move. It is so weird, because Shawn and I both felt so good about this move. We could feel it as soon as we walked in-but to have our children hurt like this in our home?
My business is doing well. Each stocking sells out very quick. I try to post some of the stuff I do on my crafty blog: Stitch N Knit
We are talking of doing a garden this year. We have a huge area on the side of the house that is perfect. I haven't ever been too successful at growing something, but I am going to try!
Bella is potty training! I can't believe it. Finally! No more diapers! LOL
I think that is all for the update for now!
Friday, March 16, 2007
I thought I had posted these, but I can't see them anywhere.
So this was Isabellas quilt I did for her. All kinds of fun textures in the fabric. I screwed up cutting so a few rows are a bit off, but oh well! It wasn't meant to be perfect!
close up-it is laying crooked-the quilt itself is not crooked! LOL
The sock monkey quilt top for my brother in law's new baby
close up of the fabrics before I ironed it.
A rag quilt for a friend who had a preemie baby (I also made some preemie hats, some preemie pants and a quilted tote bag for her daughter)
and the pants:
a quilt square for a friend's quilt who was diagnosed with cancer--she always makes me think of the tree of life, thus the tree -again, my taking pictures straight doesn't seem to happen very often and I had not ironed this yet, but it is/was perfectly square! LOL
and a quilt square for the mom whose daughter died from leukemia very quickly after being diagnosed--she loved to be a princess - the tiara was appliqued
Monday, March 05, 2007
Noah started his new medications a month ago. He switched from Zoloft (which was causing him to be worse) to Trazadone. I was scared to start him on the trazadone because of the studies I had read online about the trazadone and the increase in childhood-related suicide, but I felt really good about it this time when the doctor suggested it so we made the switch.
I can't even believe the change in him.
Don't get me wrong, he still has moments of his hyper-irritablity reaction. He still has moments of not being able to self soothe...but he actually seems happy sometimes.
This weekend as we were driving somewhere, he was just sitting in the van smiling! YES-smiling - at nothing in particular. just sitting there smiling and having fun.
He was playing with Shawn and the kids tonight...and he even leaned into me when I gave him a hug yesterday. He didn't stand all stiff as a board like normal and refuse to allow me to show him affection. he actually let me do it and gave back just a little.
I wanted to cry.
Right now he is only on the 25mg-and his dose will be upped to the 50mg. We will see how he does then.
What a different kid I have right now!
Friday, March 02, 2007
we had the grand opening of our new ONLINE STORE that was an awesome success! We almost sold out everything within 24 hours (most of it was gone the first 30 minutes!!!)
Here are a few things I did just for the store:
Needle rolls for a huge auction that was available
Another set with knitted notions bag...with my OWN pattern! WOO HOO-the yarn is hand dyed BFL
Another cute set, circular roll and markers
And then my beautiful BFL yarn in the Jade Monkey colorway
This is a custom order set I did for a lady on hyenacart, and the goldfish were very hard to send off!